Just ignore them, do not give them the satisfaction… What are parents and teachers thinking? How is it that you can tell children to stand up for someone who is being mistreated, but you are told to ignore the perpetrator when you are the victim. What is the message you are sending? Everyone else is good enough to defend, but I’m not? Ouch, nothing like adding injury to insult. What is the long-term damage to a child’s self-esteem with the latter mixed message?

Here is something we might not think about, with every crushed individual who suffers from bullying, there are many parents who anguish in silence with their child’s unhappiness. Cyberbullying transcends, and affects many levels of the family leaving invisible scars that take years to heal, and then there are those who never do heal, how sad.

What is sad, is when it is all said and done, what bullies told you to believe at a young age was not true. The latter comment is not to lessen your personal pain with the cliché, to get over it. Many victims never do, but I hope there is someone in your life that can help you see what you accepted about what others had to say, about you, was not who you were.

What happens when your peers make you feel invisible, unnoticed, and something more devastating is the feeling of not belonging? Everyone needs to feel he or she belongs. When you give that up you will end up searching for that sense of belonging the rest of your life. The catch 22 is the disdain you try to muster up towards the bullies does not work, because at the same time you are trying to seek their acceptance for healing.

Stop, you do not need to change, those who are mean need to change. It is everything right about you that singles you out. First turn to your parents or a trusted adult to confide in, and then as your back up, visit with the members of bbo and bbs, we are here for you.

The bully never remembers and the outcast never forgets.

David C Ballard

Technorati Tags: David C Ballard, scars

I have always harbored the belief that forgiveness is a powerful elixir for tragedies set against you. Some things are just intuitive and you feel them without a practical explanation of why or how it works. It is my belief that if any of us at bbo can transfer or instill for just a brief moment the thought of forgiving. I believe at that moment you can step over the boundary that holds you hostage with tormented memories of your past.

The tragedies, which occurred in several states with the shootings of innocent children, had less to do with guns and more to do with broken and lonely spirits of young adults. I would venture to guess very few in the United States missed the media coverage or the follow up talk shows. No denying these were tragic events with horrible outcomes. With such tragedies, what did we learn? Please, do not misunderstand me, the crimes were horrific, but are the circumstances that led to these tragedies still happening?

Bullying or Cyberbullying leaves many teens stranded alone with nowhere to turn. Parents are caught up in their own busy world and most consider bullying a phase and a normal part of growing up. Please, if you are here reading this, be assured you have our attention and we are implicitly aware this is not a phase nor anyway remotely considered normal for anyone to endure.

The more I read about victims, now adults, who have become advocates to reach out to others who have suffered, like themselves, at the hands of bullies online or offline is staggering. The loneliness and the number of teens who are quietly suffering is why we have developed this site.

I hope you find comfort among those you meet here and or at bbs. Remember you are not alone, and check out who Dave & Bill might be talking to on CHWradio. We will let you know if our guest will be of interest to you.

David C Ballard

Technorati Tags: Bullies, Cyberbullying, Online Harassment, Trash Texting